Friday, December 11, 2009

This is a gross season.

You never want to use injuries as an excuse for losing games (in fact, you see hockey players yelling at members of the media for trying to), because good teams find ways around adversity.

At the same time, no amount of yelling on Kris Draper's part is going to bring back Dan Cleary any sooner.

I looked down the Wing's roster today at all the little marks for day-to-day and IR, and if it hadn't been this season's Red Wings I was looking at, I would have laughed until I peed. The only reason I'm not calling injury bullshit on the universe is that, to my knowledge, none of them involved banana peels, sexual escapades, extended chase sequences, or any other three-stooges-type comical accident. So maybe that's where you'll find consolation - the team's just unlucky, they're not actually cursed.

Or maybe they are. Maybe some psychopath Blackhawks fan bought a bunch of Red Wing hockey cards, tied them up with black thread, knotted it seven times, wished a wish of fail over it and stuck it in their freezer (which I have totally never done to the Penguins during the finals).

Yeah, so that's the story I'm going with. "Trisha, can you explain the Wings' lack of offense and responsible defensive coverage against everybody and their mom this season?"

"Voodoo."

Immediate counter-measures are already underway.

1 comments:

Rob said...

I'm glad SOMEBODY is doing something to get us going again :P