A special treat for our out-of-town readers

If you watched yesterday's game on NBC in anyplace that wasn't southeast Michigan, you probably missed out on a critical portion of every NBC broadcast Red Wings playoff game - the Local 4 postgame show.

Bernie Smilovitz (who covers sports for Local 4 News) and Mickey Redmond sit in armchairs in a studio and discuss what went wrong while they wait for Katrina Hancock (who is approximately 8 feet tall (no really. She'll interview Chris Osgood, and the cameraman will have to pan down from her to reach his face.)) to convince players to say something interesting on camera.

In the spirit of the Wings' PR department's season-long "Hockeytown No Limits" campaign, and because we feel as though your lives are incomplete until you've experienced Local 4's ever-endearing awkwardness, we bring you a loosely transcribed version of yesterday's events.


Bernie: So Mickey - why did the Wings lose that game?
Mickey: Because they played like sh-
Bernie: Hang on, I'mma let you finish, but Tall Katrina has Henrik Zetterberg.

Tall Katrina: Hank, tell us why you lost that game today.
Hank: Well, um... *pouty-face* I think we yust need to keep playing our game, and um... *cries*
Tall Katrina: Bernie, back to you.

Bernie: Thanks Katrina. Now, Mickey, what do you think the keys to the Coyotes game were this afternoon?
Mickey: Well, they had a lot of puck possession down low, and one of their players still uses a wooden st-
Bernie: Hang on, I'mma let you finish, but Tall Katrina has Nicklas Lidstrom.

Nick: --of keeping the puck out of our sssone, and we need to be more physssical and not give up asss many odd-man chancesss.
Tall Katrina: What happened on that 2-on-1?
Nick: It was a 2-on-2 actually, but Raffi f#$%!d it up.
Tall Katrina: Back to you, Bernie.

Bernie: Thank you Katrina. Now, Mickey, what do the Wings need to do on Tuesday?
Mickey: They need to get in deep, keep the--
Bernie: Hang on, I'mma let you finish, but Tall Katrina has Jimmy Howard.

Tall Katrina: So Jimmy... What the hell was the matter with you today?
Jimmy: *voice actually quivers this is not a made up fact* I need to be better.
Tall Katrina: Are you less nervous three games in?
Jimmy: OMG U GUYZ I WASN'T NERVOUS TO BEGIN WITH.
Tall Katrina: What did Ozzie say to you just before this interview started?
Jimmy: He told me to pretend this game never happened. And I'd really like to.
Tall Katrina: Back to you Bernie.

Bernie: Thank you Katrina. Now Mickey -
Mickey: You gonna let me finish this time?
Bernie: Yes.
Mickey: Well I think Jimmy did the right thing, owning up to the fact that he needs to be better, and --
Bernie: Hang on, I'mma let you finish, but Tall Katrina paid Justin Abdelkader five dollars to talk with her.

Tall Katrina: Hi Justin.
Justin: Hi.

At this point I wandered out of the room because I was getting cranky and they weren't talking about anything interesting.

The Wings don't play again until Tuesday and they need a win or else this situation is going to get ugly.

Thought Bubble of the Day: What do you think the arena staff was thinking when the Cusimano brothers threw the first octopus back in 1952?